Kingdom Karma and How it Resulted in Some Serious Theological ‘Whiplash’
…ruminations from the fertile mind of Joseph B. Ostrander, that insightful blogger extraordinaire…
As the few occasional readers that actually peruse the Coastlands Vineyard Church blog may have recently discovered, I was involved in a single-vehicle automobile accident early Saturday morning as I was making my usual commute to work via Old Creek Road.
This particular Saturday commute to work was no different than the previous ones I had made during my almost 4-month tenure as a wine tasting associate at Halter Ranch Vineyards. There was nothing out-of-the-ordinary during my preparations that would’ve indicated any possible disruptions to my drive through some of the most bucolic Central Coast scenery I do enjoy on my way to work. Other than the occasional skittish deer or flock of wild turkeys in the middle of the road that do demand constant vigil and caution, my drive to work was nondescript and routine. I was in no particular hurry as my habit is to leave plenty of time to make the 28-mile drive at an efficient, yet leisurely enough pace to simply relax, meditate, take in the scenery (and my coffee), and generally arrive at work unrushed and ready to do my part at preparations for making my guests feel welcomed…
However, whatever it is that you, dear reader, understand as fate, or karma, or luck, or simply another unrelated event unconnected at all to the intricate cosmological workings of this complex natural world we inhabit, I was not able to make it to my intended destination. Unfortunately, I was involved in a single vehicle mishap that resulted in my beloved 2001 Chevy Tahoe fishtailing on some sand and gravel on one of the many turns and curves along Old Creek Road, and slowly rolling it over onto the passenger side. Ouch. My injuries were slight; some bumps and contusions on my legs, a left elbow gash that required some stitches, and of course, a very bruised ego…
{sigh}
I took the ambulance to Twin Cities Hospital in Templeton where I was carefully evaluated, stitched up, and released back into the warm world of the semi-healthy and ambulatory as a new addition to that dreaded demographic category of the transportation challenged…
{sighx2}
As with most of the unexpected, and severely inconvenient, negative happenings that are common to all men (and women too!), I was blessed with the practical assistance of being picked-up at the hospital by Pam and Don and safely driven back home. And while I was in the hospital calling friends and family about my vehicular misfortune, my eldest son called me back after I notified him of my situation and said he and his fiancé were immediately coming down to Morro Bay from Pleasant Hill, along with my 2 younger boys driving down from Modesto. I was so blessed I was left speechless. It was one of the most tender and moving moments of my lonely occupation in the emergency room I had been wheeled into earlier…
As any lucid and inquiring theological saint would do, I too contemplated my unfortunate disruption from my usually successful commutes to work and what, if any, grander theological implications could be extracted, derived, extrapolated, deduced, or otherwise concluded from the unfolding of such an unexpected and severely inconvenient episode that left me slightly shaken, stitched up, and without transportation…
Was there sin in my life that brought about the quickly escalating events leading up to me rolling my beloved Tahoe onto its passenger side, breaking every window, and strewing a few of my golf clubs forlornly along the side of Old Creek Road?
Did I deserve such a mishap? Did the devil push the rear-end of my Tahoe over the loose gravel to cause me to fishtail and overcorrect in an effort to avoid a head-on introduction to a sturdy oak looming up quickly in front of me?
Did I let me guard down? Did I misjudge the turn I had taken hundreds of times before? Did I deserve the result of said error?
Where were the angels to hold up the truck and get it back on course without the slightest bit of damage? Were they asleep on the job? Hadn’t had their coffee yet, or were enraptured and distracted by the pastoral beauty of the area?
Did God cause the mishap to get my attention? Want to teach me a very important lesson? Dramatically remove the top-heavy steel idol of my beloved, and trusty Tahoe from my life?
Or did the event simply represent the common BS-of-life that does happen to every saint regardless of their spiritual security clearance level and divinely authorized pay grade?
As the truck was rolling over my life didn’t pass before my eyes. I didn’t swear or cry out in alarm. I called out the name of Jesus more than once, but it didn’t suspend the laws of physics regarding momentum and vehicle design that ended-up with my Tahoe on its side in the opposite lane of Old Creek Road in a very embarrassing, inglorious and pitiful condition…
A big grey steel elephant of an SUV awkwardly laying on its side with its 4 tires sticking out uncharacteristically as it took its last gasps while spilling its vital mechanical fluids onto the harsh, underserving pavement…
And to think it had just turned over 200,000 miles. You were quite the trustworthy and dependable stead, my beloved 2001 Chevy Tahoe…
Nope...
God didn’t cause the accident as an attention getter, or as punishment for any number of peccadilloes I’ve committed. He didn’t remove my beloved SUV from my life because I loved it more than Him. He didn’t withhold any angelic or divine protection because I forgot to cross all my theological “t’s” or dot all my theological lower-case “j’s”…
That sturdy vehicle absorbed the unexpected roll onto its side; my seatbelts kept me tightly in the driver’s seat as they were designed to do; the air bags did not inflate, which could have caused me greater physical harm; and I survived the unwelcomed disruption relatively unscathed…
However, my usually overactive theological mind has been pondering this nagging consideration…
Did the Lord Almighty smite my Chevy Tahoe simply because He’s more of a Ford truck aficionado???
Hmmm...
I may need to pray, fast and seek spiritual guidance regarding the purchase of my replacement vehicle...
Think about it…
And then think about it some more…
Amen.